T
topnotchtree
Guest
Ok, I want to hear what kind of jokes get played on the new guys where you work. Have you guys ever sent a new hiree to the doctors office for a dutch elm shot?
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MasterBlaster
TreeHouse Elder
I don't know about jokes, but I LMAO watching somebody put a chain on backwards and then start cutting.
T
topnotchtree
Guest
anybody ever been shown the "beaute" knot, or the dragging bowline?
John Paul Sanborn
Above average climber
I've been known to give a fella a dull handsaw, then say "now try it with this one".
seanlarkin
ArboristSite Guru
Not tree related, but when I was in school, I worked at a Domino's. We'd send the new guys to other stores to pick up the Emergency Dough Repair Kit. The truly non-gifted ones, would get bounced around from store to store before they caught on.
monkeypuzzle
ArboristSite Guru
Pull up to one of these,get out as if nothing is up and watch the new guys face.
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Sent a guy looking for a roll of spooled pipe thread.
Froggy
ArboristSite Operative
Reply
Ask a new guy how two turtles mate? Then knock his hard hat down over his ears with yours. LMAO!!!
Ask a new guy how two turtles mate? Then knock his hard hat down over his ears with yours. LMAO!!!
Ummmmmmmm, wellll i've heard;
About a certain bar stretcher, when chains don't fit.
That, there is this thing about a sky hook, that might be needed on the fly (so to speak), kinda in an emergency rigging situation; the blue one works better(5/8); either will do in a pinch.
Usually the following day, or that afternoon; there is speedline work. We kinda call the line for that a gravity bender. New guy seems reluctant to go get that line in a rush, and must be retrained.
Ummmmmmmm really for training purposes only, to help a fella develop; i've hear tell ya can get him to climb up to the top of his TIP 50' + or so, then tie off tail of life line. Usually about lunch time. Then talk about all the time yours ahd gotten tangled, caaught on logs and pulled across yard like this......
Riding in the back of a truck on a hot day, can get ya run through any kind of sprinkler.
A factory i used to work at, the fullest case packed would way in at about 60#. Had the lil, punchout handles at top sides for carrying, where ya could also see type of boxes inside, in case label came off outside of the case. So, someone got he bright idea, to put empty boxes marked for the heaviest stuff inside the cases, 3 cases like that to be exact. So, if you were mean, you could pick up the 3 filled with air cases stacked on top of each other, waddling around, 1/2 running, backing up, then forward, and fall inot some poor unsusspecting party......
About a certain bar stretcher, when chains don't fit.
That, there is this thing about a sky hook, that might be needed on the fly (so to speak), kinda in an emergency rigging situation; the blue one works better(5/8); either will do in a pinch.
Usually the following day, or that afternoon; there is speedline work. We kinda call the line for that a gravity bender. New guy seems reluctant to go get that line in a rush, and must be retrained.
Ummmmmmmm really for training purposes only, to help a fella develop; i've hear tell ya can get him to climb up to the top of his TIP 50' + or so, then tie off tail of life line. Usually about lunch time. Then talk about all the time yours ahd gotten tangled, caaught on logs and pulled across yard like this......
Riding in the back of a truck on a hot day, can get ya run through any kind of sprinkler.
A factory i used to work at, the fullest case packed would way in at about 60#. Had the lil, punchout handles at top sides for carrying, where ya could also see type of boxes inside, in case label came off outside of the case. So, someone got he bright idea, to put empty boxes marked for the heaviest stuff inside the cases, 3 cases like that to be exact. So, if you were mean, you could pick up the 3 filled with air cases stacked on top of each other, waddling around, 1/2 running, backing up, then forward, and fall inot some poor unsusspecting party......
treeman82
Addicted to ArboristSite
When I was younger and working for a tree company they would "have fun" with me. They would take a running saw and put the chain brake on. Then they would come up behind me, put the tip of the saw on my backside somewhere and squeeze the throttle. Scared the living daylights out of me. Those people are not exactly sane though.
Rob Murphy
ArboristSite Operative
Turn chain insideout
My favorite is to turn a chain insideout, tangle it up and ask the new guy to unravell it.
They come back with it unravelled but with all the drive links on the outside and cutters on the inside.
1 Normal chain
My favorite is to turn a chain insideout, tangle it up and ask the new guy to unravell it.
They come back with it unravelled but with all the drive links on the outside and cutters on the inside.
1 Normal chain
Rob Murphy
ArboristSite Operative
Make heart shape
Be carfull .works better with an old chain.
Be carfull .works better with an old chain.
Rob Murphy
ArboristSite Operative
Twist
Twist Pulling gully of heart and pushing other hand away.
Twist Pulling gully of heart and pushing other hand away.
Rob Murphy
ArboristSite Operative
Wal llla!!
Inside out can be done quickly (with practise) by turning your back to new guy.
Inside out can be done quickly (with practise) by turning your back to new guy.
treeslayer
Addicted to ArboristSite
2 words;
poison ivy.
poison ivy.
Acer
ArboristSite Operative
In a factory where I used to work, they used to send new starters to the stores with instructions to ask for a "long weight". The storeman, being in on the joke, would simply say "OK" and walk off, leaving the trainee stood there for an hour or so. If the trainee was still there after that time, they'd come back and ask "Was that long enough for you?"
NeTree
Addicted to ArboristSite
Hmmm....
One new guy bragging about his "welding" skills+
One Lincoln stick-Mate +
One pile of broken skids +
One box 1/4" dowels =
-----------------------------------------
How to seperate those who can back themselves up from the rest.
Darn fool was out there an hour before he figured it out!
Worked at a concrete plant, we had some doozies...
Had one guy convinced extention cords wouldn't let "juice" flow if they're knotted.....
Used to send the new guys down to maintainance for the " 'crete-mite killer"... all them little holes in the concrete means we're infested with 'em!
And how do you get concrete out of a form? With a "form-stretcher" of course!
Guys would spend all day looking for the "coast-guard cutter"....
Sometimes we'd use the 100-ton gantry crane to put new guys cars on the roof of the plant. (But *I* never got in on that.... ahem) or box them in with castings.
hard hats filled with cement...
When it gets hot, you need to get an air-weigh
Gobs of pine-pitch can make for some fun
:angel:
One new guy bragging about his "welding" skills+
One Lincoln stick-Mate +
One pile of broken skids +
One box 1/4" dowels =
-----------------------------------------
How to seperate those who can back themselves up from the rest.
Darn fool was out there an hour before he figured it out!
Worked at a concrete plant, we had some doozies...
Had one guy convinced extention cords wouldn't let "juice" flow if they're knotted.....
Used to send the new guys down to maintainance for the " 'crete-mite killer"... all them little holes in the concrete means we're infested with 'em!
And how do you get concrete out of a form? With a "form-stretcher" of course!
Guys would spend all day looking for the "coast-guard cutter"....
Sometimes we'd use the 100-ton gantry crane to put new guys cars on the roof of the plant. (But *I* never got in on that.... ahem) or box them in with castings.
hard hats filled with cement...
When it gets hot, you need to get an air-weigh
Gobs of pine-pitch can make for some fun
:angel:
blue
ArboristSite Operative
i used to work for a company just outside london and most of the work was in the city.well me and the other climber managed to convince the groundie who was only 18 that we were complete poofs(even though were both married with kids).we were sat in a really bad traffic jam one day and all these cyclist's kept coming by and every time we saw a male one we both say "nice arse waddaya think sam".at which he would squirm in his seat and start shooting his mouth off about f£$^%£g gays.after about half hour chris stretches his arms up and places one behind sam.next thing i know chris puts his arm around sams shoulder and says "give a kiss sam!!!!!!" to which sam completely freaks and jumps out the truck and starts shouting at us about being queer.i laughed so much i very nearly rammed the car in front of us (we were moving at the tim but only slowly).it tookus ages to the little sh*t back in the truck thogh.
still makes me laugh thinking about it even though it was nearly 6 years ago!!!
still makes me laugh thinking about it even though it was nearly 6 years ago!!!
John Paul Sanborn
Above average climber
Last year!
treeman82
Addicted to ArboristSite
Ok, to be more specific... from the time I was 15, till the time I was 17.
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