Craigslist laughs

[needwood]

Hey

http://nwct.craigslist.org/zip/1862138317.html

Free wood You cut the trees (Harwinton,Ct.)
Date: 2010-07-25, 11:36AM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]

I have 6 or 7 large trees that are in danger of hitting my septic tank / leech fields and my house : one was hit by lightening and one is split down the middle. I can't afford to pay some one to take them down.

You can have all of the wood to do what you want with.. You MUST have up to date insurance as I won't be responsible if something happens. Also you will need a bucket and a chipper. I want them down SOON!

Can some of you guys loan me a chipper,bucket truck, and the gas money to get to Harwinton CT? LOL

 

[stihlaficionado]

thats right, free delivery of free firewood!
.. how can you beat that!?

http://cnj.craigslist.org/zip/1815556704.html
Free Firewood removed from a garage. This wood was siding and shelving/etc removed from a garage during a rennovation. I will deliver this wood for free within 25 miles from my location in piscataway. The wood is free and delivery is free within 25 miles of piscataway. Please call rather than email as i don't check email as often. Wood would be optimal in an outdoor or indoor woodburning furnace, a fire pit, or would be excellent for a campfire. All of the wood might total about 5-6 loads in my 8' pickup bed. I will be happy to deliver any number of loads whether 1 or all or anywhere in-between

Warning: must wear respirator when burning as wood may contain arsenic and volatile chemicals as result of painting/staining

 

[Circle B MN]

Warning: must wear respirator when burning as wood may contain arsenic and volatile chemicals as result of painting/staining

That is CL awesome right there...

 

[SpiralAcacia]

That is CL awesome right there...

Yeah well to look at the bright side, at least HE doesn't demand an "Up to date professional insurance" or something of the sort....

SA

 

[cat-face timber]

http://nwct.craigslist.org/zip/1862138317.html

Free wood You cut the trees (Harwinton,Ct.)
Date: 2010-07-25, 11:36AM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]

I have 6 or 7 large trees that are in danger of hitting my septic tank / leech fields and my house : one was hit by lightening and one is split down the middle. I can't afford to pay some one to take them down.

You can have all of the wood to do what you want with.. You MUST have up to date insurance as I won't be responsible if something happens. Also you will need a bucket and a chipper. I want them down SOON!

Ow please let me fall these trees, and not hit your house!
all for free, but I do get to keep the wood.
OUCH,
I wonder if anybody actually helps these people?

 

[D&B Mack]

Ow please let me fall these trees, and not hit your house!
all for free, but I do get to keep the wood.
OUCH,
I wonder if anybody actually helps these people?

I bet every once-in-a-while they find a moron. The worst part about it is the fact he is demanding it get done "SOON". From his proposal, he is in no position to be ordering someone around. He should be begging instead.

 

[Iska3]

I bet every once-in-a-while they find a moron. The worst part about it is the fact he is demanding it get done "SOON". From his proposal, he is in no position to be ordering someone around. He should be begging instead.

The only moron they'll find is the one posting the ad.. Why do these people think their trees are made of gold.. We paid some company $1,000.00 to take down one fair size ash at the mother-in-laws house in NJ. It would have been less but they cut the trunk in 16 inch rounds and left it buy the curbside for a week and being no one picked them up for free, we were charged for the full price. I always thought these ads were some sort of a joke. Who in their right mind expects someone to come in with their equipment and remove a tree for free. I'd like to tell a few of these people where they can stick their wood.

 

[stihlaficionado]

I bet every once-in-a-while they find a moron. The worst part about it is the fact he is demanding it get done "SOON". From his proposal, he is in no position to be ordering someone around. He should be begging instead.

The only moron they'll find is the one posting the ad.. Why do these people think their trees are made of gold.. We paid some company $1,000.00 to take down one fair size ash at the mother-in-laws house in NJ. It would have been less but they cut the trunk in 16 inch rounds and left it buy the curbside for a week and being no one picked them up for free, we were charged for the full price. I always thought these ads were some sort of a joke. Who in their right mind expects someone to come in with their equipment and remove a tree for free. I'd like to tell a few of these people where they can stick their wood.

IMO all these ads result from the mistaken notion that tree services/arborists are not truly professionals. It's as if anyone with a saw can take down a tree.

Do you see any ads in Craigslist for doctors/lawers to fix an appendix or settle
an estate lien?

 

[Art Vandelay]

IMO all these ads result from the mistaken notion that tree services/arborists are not truly professionals. It's as if anyone with a saw can take down a tree.

Do you see any ads in Craigslist for doctors/lawers to fix an appendix or settle
an estate lien?

You sayin you're gonna charge me for my brain transplant?:monkey:

 

[svon89]

From my dealings with people in my area the doctors and lawyers are posting those ads. Once I tried to be a nice guy and help a friend who got himself into a bind with an ad like that. The guy wanted me to sign off on this and that etc. I said it wasn't worth my time and left. Turns out the guy was a lawyer and when he presented my friend with a 10+ page document to sign he walked.
It was not tree related but rather carpentry related.

 

[stihlaficionado]

You sayin you're gonna charge me for my brain transplant?:monkey:

Free on-the-house...we have in storage a slightly used cerebellum(former owner was Tony Heyward, BP ex-CEO) that will fit perfectly


I see this attitude in a lot of the trades

 

[gr8scott72]

IMO all these ads result from the mistaken notion that tree services/arborists are not truly professionals. It's as if anyone with a saw can take down a tree.

Do you see any ads in Craigslist for doctors/lawers to fix an appendix or settle
an estate lien?

But we'll let you keep the appendix for free!! It's got to be worth something right?

 

[stihlaficionado]

But we'll let you keep the appendix for free!! It's got to be worth something right?

Only if it doesn't have gangrene

 

[D&B Mack]

Here you go...

Heart Surgery - Wanted Free (Warminster)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2010-07-28, 8:31PM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Looking for heart surgery for free. Surgeon must have all certifications and insurances. Surgery needs to be done immediately or I will die. Transplants are optional by your choice, but I must approve the donor prior to surgery. You can keep the old heart for free. *BONUS!!!* I will pay for all disposable equipment for the surgery which you can keep for your next surgery. I will also need you to bring a hospital bed for me to used during my recovery, which I will return once I am better. Only serious contacts please, no emails, call (610) 555-1212.

P.S. If need be, I can trade a used lawn mower for your services. (Craftsman w/ 42" deck)


•Location: Warminster
•it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

[banshee67]

not only do they want you to work for FREE, but they also want you to PAY THEM to remove their 2 black walnut trees.
this is MUCH BETTER than one of those "work for the wood" deals.. you get the rare opportunity to PAY the homeowner to remove their trees!!



http://cnj.craigslist.org/for/1863171754.html

Hi,
We have 2 Black Walnut trees - the one tree looks like it might be on its last let (top of tree is losing leaves and bottom looks ok). It is 74 inches around at 5 foot and the other is 104 inches around at 5 foot.
Looking for someone to come in, cut them down and remove them and pay us for the wood.
Thanks,

 

[banshee67]

i was so offended by that ad, i couldnt help but send them an email:
i hope i offended them enough to get a response


i have seen a lot of people on craigslist looking for people to perform work in exchange for "the wood" as pay, but yours takes the cake.
you have 2 black walnut trees. congratulations. they are worth nothing. well actually, they are worth about $200 a cord, as firewood, once cut split and seasoned. saw mills dont take "yard trees" as the risk of them hitting a nail or anything metal far outweighs the possible profit, if any, for milling the 2 trees. they hit 1 nail and wreck a blade, and they lost more money in down time, than they could have ever made off 20 of your black walnut yard trees.
your best bet is to offer the wood for FREE, yes i know thats tough to swallow, offer the wood for FREE, in exchange for someone coming over and doing hours of work for free!! get a few free quotes for removal from tree companies, you will be surprised, its a dangerous job with lots of overhead and risks.
if you want the trees gone for free, if you can cope with that,your best bet is a firewood burner who could use the wood for fuel this winter. you might find someone willing to come use their truck, their trailer, their saws, their fuel, their labor, etc, to remove them, for free ,in exchange for the wood to use as firewood this winter.
the idea that you think someone is going to PAY YOU, to remove YOUR TREES, is absolutely hysterical, ive seen lots of "remove our trees keep the wood" deals, but never "pay us to remove our trees" ... i guess you figure since they are black walnut, someone will pay for the privilege to remove them, right? wrong.. they would go through the chipper and get turned into 2" wood chips just like every other tree.
since when has it been ok to ask people to pay to work for you? isnt it usually the other way around..? im confused
if you wana drop the trees and cut them up into firewood lengths, THEN you might be able to sell them for peanuts... if you really want to make any money out of those trees, youre gona have to cut them down, cut them to 16-18" lengths, split them, then let them season, then if you have a truck and trailer, you will be able to deliver them for $200 a cord. (remember a cord of wood + trailer can weigh well over 5,000+ lbs, so your subaru wont do the job)

good luck , god speed

 

[yooper]

i was so offended by that ad, i couldnt help but send them an email:
i hope i offended them enough to get a response


i have seen a lot of people on craigslist looking for people to perform work in exchange for "the wood" as pay, but yours takes the cake.
you have 2 black walnut trees. congratulations. they are worth nothing. well actually, they are worth about $200 a cord, as firewood, once cut split and seasoned. saw mills dont take "yard trees" as the risk of them hitting a nail or anything metal far outweighs the possible profit, if any, for milling the 2 trees. they hit 1 nail and wreck a blade, and they lost more money in down time, than they could have ever made off 20 of your black walnut yard trees.
your best bet is to offer the wood for FREE, yes i know thats tough to swallow, offer the wood for FREE, in exchange for someone coming over and doing hours of work for free!! get a few free quotes for removal from tree companies, you will be surprised, its a dangerous job with lots of overhead and risks.
if you want the trees gone for free, if you can cope with that,your best bet is a firewood burner who could use the wood for fuel this winter. you might find someone willing to come use their truck, their trailer, their saws, their fuel, their labor, etc, to remove them, for free ,in exchange for the wood to use as firewood this winter.
the idea that you think someone is going to PAY YOU, to remove YOUR TREES, is absolutely hysterical, ive seen lots of "remove our trees keep the wood" deals, but never "pay us to remove our trees" ... i guess you figure since they are black walnut, someone will pay for the privilege to remove them, right? wrong.. they would go through the chipper and get turned into 2" wood chips just like every other tree.
since when has it been ok to ask people to pay to work for you? isnt it usually the other way around..? im confused
if you wana drop the trees and cut them up into firewood lengths, THEN you might be able to sell them for peanuts... if you really want to make any money out of those trees, youre gona have to cut them down, cut them to 16-18" lengths, split them, then let them season, then if you have a truck and trailer, you will be able to deliver them for $200 a cord. (remember a cord of wood + trailer can weigh well over 5,000+ lbs, so your subaru wont do the job)

good luck , god speed

hahaha...Thats some pretty good #### there!!!

 

[WetBehindtheEar]

:agree2:

I've often felt like sending a 'strongly worded letter' like that to a craigslister... but then I realize that the action alone opens me up to a whole world of internet harassment that I'm just not willing to deal with.

The person posting the ridiculous ad may be like the homeowner in the original post that Avalancher wrote about. That guy was crazier than a S**T House rat. And most of my run-ins with free firewood from craigslist have been CRAY HAY HAY Zeee...

Banshee's got balls as big as church bells.

TB

 

[banshee67]

:agree2:

I've often felt like sending a 'strongly worded letter' like that to a craigslister... but then I realize that the action alone opens me up to a whole world of internet harassment that I'm just not willing to deal with.

The person posting the ridiculous ad may be like the homeowner in the original post that Avalancher wrote about. That guy was crazier than a S**T House rat. And most of my run-ins with free firewood from craigslist have been CRAY HAY HAY Zeee...

Banshee's got balls as big as church bells.

TB

lol, internet harassment, come on,i wish theyd harass me, thatd be fun!
i could just block them and ignore them, i doubt ill even get a response though,although i hope i do, i am interested to hear the thoughts of a man or woman ballsy enough to post that to begin with. it would be a pleasure to speak with them. i even use my personal email that i use for all internet purchasing, business transactions, etc. with my personal name in letterhead. they only live about 5 miles from me as well. im not worried, i know karate.
my only fear when sending emails like the above, is that oneday ill actually send them an email interested in something they have on craigslist, or they email me about firewwood, then see my email and well.. you know

 

[BlueRidgeMark]

:agree2:

I've often felt like sending a 'strongly worded letter' like that to a craigslister... but then I realize that the action alone opens me up to a whole world of internet harassment that I'm just not willing to deal with.

I do it every couple of weeks, from a disposable email address. I give them links (they're around here somewhere) from reputable sources about the value, or LACK of value, of yard trees.


No responses so far.