Redneck hotsaw catalog

[Marky Mark]

I am building a website for a hotsaw builder. I would like to place a few jokes in there. Can you guys post a few redneck chainsaw one liners that you can think of.

Here’s one, you might be a redneck chain saw racer if you buy those cheesy wrap around sun glasses at the liquor store for 2 bucks.

Or hey look at my redneck HEHAW sneakers standing next to the King of LumberJacks,

 

[spacemule]

If talk about oil and strokes makes you think of powertools, you may be a redneck chainsaw racer.

 

[Vman]

if ya' have to mow yer' front yard to find yer' chainsaw, ya' might be a redneck chainsaw racer.

i'm gonna hear about this one......if you use an old can of SKOAL for an air- filter, you might be a redneck chainsaw racer ...no offense meant, just had to say it!

 

[jokers]

Or hey look at my redneck HEHAW sneakers standing next to the King of LumberJacks,

I thought they were bowling shoes!

 

[kf_tree]

now this is a styling pair of bowling shoe's.

 

[Marky Mark]

Ken I bet you have a gold bowling pin neck charm to go with those lizard slippers.

 

[kf_tree]

i'll have to look for the pic's........the last house i renovated in staten island.....i did the floors and countertops out of bowling lanes i salvaged before the building was torn down. HEAVY stuff to work with.

 

[Mcsaw]

If you trim your hedges with a chainsaw you might be a redneck.

 

[Lawn Masters]

If you mow your lawn with a chainsaw, you just might be a redneck

 

[Grande Dog]

If your saw chain has more teeth than your family, you might be a redneck chainsaw racer.

Grande Dog
Master Mechanic
Discount Arborist Equipment and Tree Care Supplies

 

[SWE#Kipp]

haha good one grande

 

[Vman]

Grande Dog .....2 thumbs up for that one!!! (would give u 3 thumbs up if i were a redneck)

 

[Chopwood]

Vman-
do you race? Do I know who you are?

 

[MacDaddy]

If your <a style='text-decoration: none; border-bottom: 3px double;' href="http://www.serverlogic3.com/lm/rtl3.asp?si=22&k=saw%20chain" onmouseover="window.status='saw chain'; return true;" onmouseout="window.status=''; return true;">saw chain</a> has more teeth than your family, you might be a redneck chainsaw racer.

Thats why plumas county is home of the skip tooth crank hoe they are very hard to sneek up on because they never sleep You can get a glimps of one hanging out in the back of the local bar doing the 2 tooth scrapper move for a bag of meth the preferd food of this wild creature never aproch one of these if you have had to much to drink because you will wake up the next day with empty pockets and in need of penicillen for the crack cough you will have to get rid of so if you ever see one beware the skip tooth crank hoe is not one to play with

 

[pbtree]

If you shave with full comp chain, you just might be a redneck chain saw racer...

 

[Vman]

Chopwood...........nope, do not race, i am just a home-owner with heavy usage.
i am a few miles from Port Jervis. i believe there is a race/comp in Otisville in a few weeks...you gonna be there? I'm gonna go check it out and look at the saws to see what the racers do to them, than maybe fire up the milling machine and lathe and begin a project for the helluva it and see what i can come up with.

 

[Chopwood]

Vman-
No, I don't go to Otisville. That is a show for woodticks and wannabes. Don't take this as being elitist, and I am not Stihl series material, but I don't belong at shows like that. I hear it is entertaining, though. If you want to see an awesome show, go to booneville, NY in two weeks. I've got some extra passes if you want. They sent me six this year, don't know why.

 

[CNYCountry]

Vman-
No, I don't go to Otisville. That is a show for woodticks and wannabes. Don't take this as being elitist, and I am not Stihl series material, but I don't belong at shows like that. I hear it is entertaining, though. If you want to see an awesome show, go to booneville, NY in two weeks. I've got some extra passes if you want. They sent me six this year, don't know why.

I don't mean to pick but if he has to look up where he's going he'll have better luck with "Boonville"... That is a great show, international competitors, I always go but I'm stuck with something else that weekend this year...

 

[Vman]

Chopwood...thanks for the offer, but gonna pass...looks to be about 3 1/2 hour ride for me. i have never been to one before so otisville will be good for a first time "look-see" for me.....and it is only about 15 mins from my house.

if anyone knows the date and time for otisville, please let me know. i also need where in otisville it is.
thanks

 

[Chopwood]

Chainsawworld will be able to tell you, maybe CCicora also. CNY, my spelling was never that good, pick away.