What's the worst you've done to an idiot customer?

[cookies]

You were greatly inconvenienced again with this customer, but this time you did it to yourself. He not only didn't learn a darn thing, he got you to diagnose it and remove the bed for him.

Next time he calls, "Not interested. This isn't a hobby, this is how I feed my dog and keep my lights on, so I only work for paying customers. Good luck with your truck." Click.

Done.

It cost me a hour of my time, he was the type of person that would continue to call and bother someone every other week even after you politely said i'm not interested. Not to mention the fun I had calling him back a few times over the next month and a half to ask if he was ready to proceed with the repairs..his excuses were pretty funny.

 

[OM617YOTA]

It cost me a hour of my time, he was the type of person that would continue to call and bother someone every other week even after you politely said i'm not interested. Not to mention the fun I had calling him back a few times over the next month and a half to ask if he was ready to proceed with the repairs..his excuses were pretty funny.

It's your life, but I've got lots of things I'd rather be doing for an hour.

 

[Chucksta]

I never thought that this thread would go this long, and generate commentaries on what "professionalism" means.. Wow I don't know. Maybe I should have been more specific about what a huge effhat that this guy was. I have patience, tons of it.. I have kids, and they have taught me that and more. I've done stuff for basically free, because I had to explain to a Homeowner, that because of some random Asian, Ash Borer beetle, that they now needed to drop up to 20K to remedy the situation. As long as they paid enough to cover the crew, I'd swallow my own time, and other costs, ( fuel, lunch for the crew.. etc.)
But this dude was my own personal challenge. As I've said, I have a ton of patience, I'd have gladly spent an hour and a half explaining his options. I had no problem with that, explaining options comes with the territory. But he slowly but surely descended into being a total douche. It became rapidly obvious that he was into it to eff me over.
I've got the patience of Job.. But this one guy took me over the line.. "Why don't you show me how long it takes to drop a tree" was the tipping point. I could see that he was just wanting to be a player, and just dick with me.
That was the end of the road for me. Dude!! Really?!? Game on!! He called the game, and got what he asked for.
I appreciate all the comments about "professionalism", etc. And I've taken some notes, and quotes. But, every man has his breaking point, and he reached mine. And then some.
As I've said, this thread went far beyond what I thought it would. can we please close it, and just move on.

 

[TheJollyLogger]

I never thought that this thread would go this long, and generate commentaries on what "professionalism" means.. Wow I don't know. Maybe I should have been more specific about what a huge effhat that this guy was. I have patience, tons of it.. I have kids, and they have taught me that and more. I've done stuff for basically free, because I had to explain to a Homeowner, that because of some random Asian, Ash Borer beetle, that they now needed to drop up to 20K to remedy the situation. As long as they paid enough to cover the crew, I'd swallow my own time, and other costs, ( fuel, lunch for the crew.. etc.)
But this dude was my own personal challenge. As I've said, I have a ton of patience, I'd have gladly spent an hour and a half explaining his options. I had no problem with that, explaining options comes with the territory. But he slowly but surely descended into being a total douche. It became rapidly obvious that he was into it to eff me over.
I've got the patience of Job.. But this one guy took me over the line.. "Why don't you show me how long it takes to drop a tree" was the tipping point. I could see that he was just wanting to be a player, and just **** with me.
That was the end of the road for me. Dude!! Really?!? Game on!! He called the game, and got what he asked for.
I appreciate all the comments about "professionalism", etc. And I've taken some notes, and quotes. But, every man has his breaking point, and he reached mine. And then some.
As I've said, this thread went far beyond what I thought it would. can we please close it, and just move on.

You walked up unsolicited to an old man's house and dropped a tree across his driveway, dude. Stop trying to justify it. He's got a right to be as big a ********* as he wants on his own property. What you did was just plain wrong. I've yet to see you express any remorse for it.

 

[OM617YOTA]

I never thought that this thread would go this long, and generate commentaries on what "professionalism" means.. Wow I don't know. Maybe I should have been more specific about what a huge effhat that this guy was. I have patience, tons of it.. I have kids, and they have taught me that and more. I've done stuff for basically free, because I had to explain to a Homeowner, that because of some random Asian, Ash Borer beetle, that they now needed to drop up to 20K to remedy the situation. As long as they paid enough to cover the crew, I'd swallow my own time, and other costs, ( fuel, lunch for the crew.. etc.)
But this dude was my own personal challenge. As I've said, I have a ton of patience, I'd have gladly spent an hour and a half explaining his options. I had no problem with that, explaining options comes with the territory. But he slowly but surely descended into being a total douche. It became rapidly obvious that he was into it to eff me over.
I've got the patience of Job.. But this one guy took me over the line.. "Why don't you show me how long it takes to drop a tree" was the tipping point. I could see that he was just wanting to be a player, and just **** with me.
That was the end of the road for me. Dude!! Really?!? Game on!! He called the game, and got what he asked for.
I appreciate all the comments about "professionalism", etc. And I've taken some notes, and quotes. But, every man has his breaking point, and he reached mine. And then some.
As I've said, this thread went far beyond what I thought it would. can we please close it, and just move on.

"She made me hit her."

You weren't trapped there and you control your own actions. Soon as you knew it wouldn't be profitable, just get back in your truck and leave.

 

[Husky77]

I had this old man that used me for a diag and never paid and changed the parts himself, a user of others.. he contacted me again and again about a truck he wanted to get running and I knew it would be a good bit of work and he would stiff me at all costs. turned out to be a bad fuel pump in 80's pickup , I used his oxy torch to blow out all of the bed bolts and used his tractor to lift the bed....I knew the tank was rotten and the pump was too, told the guy a triple price estimate packed up my floor mats and left, I left all his crap just as I used it taking up his whole barn in a trapeeze bed lifted mess that can not be reassembled and went home. Fixed his manipulative sorry arse for wasting my time and the funniest part was he was a renter and none of the tools, truck or property were his. Pretty sure he no longer lives around here now...

sadly some learn quicker than other

 

[Breckinridge Elkins]

We, stewards of the land and watchdogs for the environment....

You, the insufferable busybodies and Karens....

 

[TNTreeHugger]

You, the insufferable busybodies and Karens....

 

[Breckinridge Elkins]

View attachment 1187406

Not my job. That's what all your cats are for.

 

[TNTreeHugger]

Not my job. That's what all your cats are for.

What's your problem, Paul in Nevada?

 

[Nietzschean Bugman]

Yeah, but you don't drop a tree across the dudes driveway and take off...

The type of stuff i would consider deleting someone frome yhe server over

 

[user 197460]

The worst thing I’ve done to an idiot customer is walk away.

 

[donmakesallthefuelbegone]

The worst thing I’ve done to an idiot customer is walk away.

That’s the best/most grown up thing to do but honestly sometimes you just get so pissed off that you’d rather have some fun lol

 

[Jim Colton]

Well.. I guess that I should start with my own story.

"Back in the day", which wasn't really that long ago, We were cutting down Ash trees in the GTA ( Toronto), that had been infected by the Asian Ash Beetle. Once we had a job set up, and the crew was working, I'd take my partner and walk the neighbourhood looking for work. We came across a 3 acre property that had at least 20 plus Ash trees on it, so we went up and banged on the door. Out comes this old guy.. older than Christ's diapers, and we proceed to dance.
It started out O.K... We realized that we'd have to explain stuff to him, and give him price and service options. It went well at first, then he proceeded to keep moving the goal posts. Every time he moved the "goal posts", we had to re-calculate the quote.
First it was a complete job.. Drop the trees, not damage the lawn, remove all brush, split the wood and pile it .. grind the stumps and sod. Then it was drop the trees, damage the lawn, remove all brush, and leave the stumps at 6 inches.. Etc.. etc.. etc.. We'd been there over an hour, and I'd had enough of his crap. I'm giving my partner the hand signs to just let it go, leave him a card and to call when he was serious about dealing with the issue. Randy wasn't having it.. He was determined to land the fish. And truthfully, what we were quoting him wasn't putting huge payday on our plate. We realized that, for a homeowner to suddenly have an unexpected bill for tree removal, for 20K to 30 K, was a bit of a kick, and it wasn't covered by insurance.
Usually, I've got a ton of patience, but, when I get to the end of my rope, yeah.. I can be a ****. The straw that broke the camels back, was when he looked at me and asked me "How long does it take to drop a tree?".. I couldn't believe it! I asked him what he would do with the trees once I dropped them. His answer was " Well, I've got a chainsaw, I'll just deal with it myself."..
Seriously, the guy was probably in his mid 70s'.. He had the look and build to him like he'd never dealt with anything heavier than a calculator. I asked him what kind of chainsaw.. Maybe I mis-judged him.. " Oh, it's a corded electric"
I'm giving Randy the hand signals to " let's get out of here." Nope.. Randy still wants to dance with this idiot.. Darn..
The tipping point was when he said.. " Show me how long it takes you to drop a tree. Maybe I'd be better off just to pay you by the hour to drop them." I bit my tongue, and pretended to walk around a bit, looking at the 20 plus trees, as if I was trying to make up a new quote for him. Inside, I was seething. I was , at this point, planning revenge.
There was one Ash tree near his driveway. A good 70 to 80 ft tall. He had a circular driveway in front of his house, and there was a decent gap between the house and the garage. His Mercedes was more towards the house, in the circular section of the driveway . I smiled and looked at him, and said " You know, that's fair.. I've never been paid just to drop them and go away.".
I walked over to the truck, and got out the Echo 590.. The look on Randy's eyes was priceless. I sparked it up, and lined up the big Ash.. Yup.. Drop it right, and it would miss the house, miss the garage, and seal his Mercedes in the driveway.
I could see Randy giving me the "no" sign, but at that point, I just didn't care.. at all.. Tossed the face cut in, popped out the chunk, and then flipped over to the felling cut. I got far enough into it, that I knew it was ready to go. As soon as I heard the first "snap , crackle , pop." I pulled the saw out of the cut. The old dude just kinda looked at me like " Well .. now what..?. I waved Randy over towards me, so that he'd be on my side of the tree, when it went down... leaving the homeowner on the house side of the tree.
I yelled at the homeowner.. " Ya might not wanna stand there!" You could hear the trunk starting to go. Not 30 seconds later, down she comes.. One of my better aims.. didn't hit the house.. didn't hit the garage.. didn't hit the Mercedes..
But.. here we were.. Me and Randy, standing on one side of this exploded Ash tree, and his sorry butt on the other.. His Mercedes wasn't leaving the driveway until that tree got removed. Sweet!!
Back to the truck, with the 590 in my hand, and Randy in hot pursuit.. We left like our butts were on fire. Homeowner was still in the driveway, with an open mouthed gape.. LMFAO
The old dude was still standing there in disbelief, as we bailed for the road.. Randy was like " He's gonna call the cops, we're gonna get sued!!." Nope".. I said.. He asked us to drop a tree, to "see how long it took." We didn't damage anything, we did as he requested for free, as in he wanted to see how long it took to drop a tree.
We never heard another word about it.. But, about three weeks later, we had the occasion to pass by that property on the way to another job.. There was some old Chinese guy up on a ladder, wearing flip flops, what looked like his wife and two kids on the ground who looked like they were maybe 12 to 14 years old, cleaning up what Dad had cut.. Gotta wonder what they quoted him.
But.. never heard another word about dropping a biggie across his driveway..

So.. What's the worst you've ever done to an idiot client??

I don't have a similar story but... If there were no dangerous trees on his property, I might have quoted him $1,00 ~ $200 an hour or whatever you would find tolerable to drop as many as he selected and then offered him pricing on the cleanup after he spent a day with his electric saw finding out how much work he was in for. Nothing wrong with piece work or Time and materials in my mind. Dropping that particular tree in that particular scenario seems really inappropriate.

 

[pdqdl]

I charge considerably more "per hour" when I am dropping trees. An hourly rate doesn't cover the higher liability risk involved with dropping trees close to houses. My standard price is $200.00 for trees where the drop is risky or perhaps an idiot could do it wrong. Much more if it is perilous.

 

[ckliff]

What an entertaining thread. The OP asked to drop it, I say keep it going. What I find encouraging is the real lack of more posts about what to do to "idiot" customers. Tells me most of us are decent at running our business.

 

[lone wolf]

Yeah, but you don't drop a tree across the dudes driveway and take off...

How about after they refuse to pay?

 

[TheJollyLogger]

How about after they refuse to

How about after they refuse to pay?

No... there are professional ways to resolve issues. I learned a long time ago not to wrestle pigs.

 

[Matt81]

Not had anything quite as dramatic as dropping a tree across someones drive........ but there have been times i sure would have liked to, believe me.

The worst i have personally had was a massive hedge i cut years ago. Was a 2-3 day job. Owner came out several times each day and was saying how good it looked and chatting while i was working. However the moment i had cleaned up and was packing up my truck to leave it was like they were a different person. With their wife at their side they were making out they were extremely unhappy and that it was too high and they wanted it cut a few inches lower or they were not going to pay.

Turns out their wife wanted it lower and thought it was just a 5 min job to do that. Nope the entire hedge has to be recut. Pointed out to him that he never said a word that it was too high the entire time and i cut it exactly where i was told to. They tried to pull the customer is always right crap on me and expected me to do it all again for free. Sorry not this sucker.

I got paid but never went back even though i was called many times. I told him straight that i have no time for that kind of nonsense when i have many customers who would never do that to me.

 

[pdqdl]

Now I've never been in that position, but I think I'd explain that all the bridges between my shop and your driveway got burned right after we left the last time we were there.