Rudolf73
Addicted to ArboristSite
How about you make some saw videos... nahh only joking :hmm3grin2orange:
the all aussie dribble thread!
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How about you make some saw videos... nahh only joking :hmm3grin2orange:
lumberjackau
ArboristSite Guru
the dude in the car cracks me up
How about these...
They might be good for climbing too?
no way we not talkin shoes aww come on,, heels, the only place they look good or to be noticed r bouncin on ma shoulders behind ma ears :msp_tongue:
Rudolf73
Addicted to ArboristSite
Haha I was just going to comment on that - he is trying to keep dry while he eats his bikkies
Stihlman441
Addicted to ArboristSite
OK last one,i feel like going milling know.:biggrin:
[video=youtube;jBOGIXJ-mfQ]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBOGIXJ-mfQ&feature=channel&list=UL[/video]
[video=youtube;jBOGIXJ-mfQ]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBOGIXJ-mfQ&feature=channel&list=UL[/video]
strewth a saw buzzin so close to nice pair of pins (but unskilled) tis making me nervous,, a trip and be a hell of mess and ruin them a her modeling career fast.
them Ruski soft woods :msp_razz:, sheila comrades comski downski here git sumthin so hard that a cat can,t scratch. :hmm3grin2orange:
today dinks no foolies i had to field a call to a mr Cock,,, ok unfortunate surname but I,m a professional so no giggles carry on. Then the lassy on the reception bone says oh he,s out of office workin at Swallow house today,,,,,, I started tearin up biting ma tongue crying twas all to much oh deary me....Job went well all sorted and sos if yer listing in Mr C but well thy gotta laugh.....
A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch.
It doesn't have any feet or legs.
The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?'
The parrot says, 'I was born this way.
I'm a defective parrot.'
'Holy crap,' the guy replies.
'You actually understood and answered me. !'
'I got every word,' says the parrot.
'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird'
'Oh yeah?' the guy asks.
'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?'
'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook.
You can't see it, because of my feathers.'
'Wow,' says the guy.
'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?'
'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy.
I'm especially good at ornithology.
You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.'
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag.
'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'
'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me, cause I don't have any feet.
You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer.!'
The guy offers $20, and walks out with the parrot.
Weeks go by.
The parrot is sensational.
He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful.
The guy is delighted.
One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing.
'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife, and the Austpost man.'
'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy.
'When he delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at the door, in a sheer black nightie.'
'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously.
'THEN what happened?'
'Well, he came into the house, and lifted up her nightie, and began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.
'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?'
'Yes.
Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and began to kiss her all over.'
Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?'
DUNNO?!? I got an erection, and fell off my perch.!'
It doesn't have any feet or legs.
The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?'
The parrot says, 'I was born this way.
I'm a defective parrot.'
'Holy crap,' the guy replies.
'You actually understood and answered me. !'
'I got every word,' says the parrot.
'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird'
'Oh yeah?' the guy asks.
'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?'
'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook.
You can't see it, because of my feathers.'
'Wow,' says the guy.
'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?'
'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy.
I'm especially good at ornithology.
You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.'
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag.
'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'
'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me, cause I don't have any feet.
You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer.!'
The guy offers $20, and walks out with the parrot.
Weeks go by.
The parrot is sensational.
He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful.
The guy is delighted.
One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing.
'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife, and the Austpost man.'
'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy.
'When he delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at the door, in a sheer black nightie.'
'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously.
'THEN what happened?'
'Well, he came into the house, and lifted up her nightie, and began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.
'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?'
'Yes.
Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and began to kiss her all over.'
Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?'
DUNNO?!? I got an erection, and fell off my perch.!'
ausneil 1
Addicted to ArboristSite
Heres another one.
RETIRED HUSBAND
>
> After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
> Target.
>
> Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get
> in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
> loves
> to browse.
>
> Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local
> Target:
>
> Dear Mrs. Harris ,
>
> Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our
> store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both
> of
> you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr.
> Harris , are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
> cameras:
>
> 1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
> people's carts when they weren't looking.
>
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
> intervals.
>
> 3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
> women's restroom.
>
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
> 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
> leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor
> that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to
> lose time and costing the company money.
>
> 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
> lay-by.
>
> 6.. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
>
> 7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
> children
> shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets
> from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
>
> 8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
> and
> screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
>
> 9... September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
> mirror while he picked his nose.
>
> 10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
> the clerk where the antidepressants were..
>
> 11... October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming
> the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
>
> 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by
> using different sizes of funnels.
>
> 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
> yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
>
> 14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
> assumed
> the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!
>
> 15.. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
> fitting room?
>
> And last, but not least:
>
> 16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
> and
> then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'
> One of the clerks passed out.
>
>
>
RETIRED HUSBAND
>
> After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
> Target.
>
> Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get
> in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
> loves
> to browse.
>
> Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local
> Target:
>
> Dear Mrs. Harris ,
>
> Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our
> store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both
> of
> you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr.
> Harris , are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
> cameras:
>
> 1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
> people's carts when they weren't looking.
>
> 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
> intervals.
>
> 3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
> women's restroom.
>
> 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
> 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
> leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor
> that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to
> lose time and costing the company money.
>
> 5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
> lay-by.
>
> 6.. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
>
> 7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
> children
> shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets
> from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
>
> 8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
> and
> screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
>
> 9... September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
> mirror while he picked his nose.
>
> 10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
> the clerk where the antidepressants were..
>
> 11... October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming
> the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
>
> 12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by
> using different sizes of funnels.
>
> 13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
> yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
>
> 14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
> assumed
> the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!
>
> 15.. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
> fitting room?
>
> And last, but not least:
>
> 16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile,
> and
> then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'
> One of the clerks passed out.
>
>
>
AUSSIE1
Al.
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2006
- Messages
- 8,004
- Reaction score
- 1,979
Was his christian Richard?
tdi-rick
Addicted to ArboristSite
The Gaming Minister in the previous state Govt here was Richard Face.
His parents mustn't have like him, but it would toughen you up at school.
Rudolf73
Addicted to ArboristSite
I know us guys like 'birds' and stuff, some maybe more than others... so I thought we can play a game.
Guess the name of this bird...
The winner gets a high-five and some rep :biggrin:
*Just a little bit of TGIF humour
Guess the name of this bird...
The winner gets a high-five and some rep :biggrin:
*Just a little bit of TGIF humour
without a google search I reckon its blue footed a booby
ok mum twas a keen bird watcher so i had the advantage of many books in the home sir hmm my turn to find one?
ok following the theme
Rudolf73
Addicted to ArboristSite
Yes that's it!
deye223
Addicted to ArboristSite
i don't see any boobys the bloke that named that bird must have been missing his woman :dribble:
Rudolf73
Addicted to ArboristSite
ok following the theme
I have no idea but I bet its not a boobie.
Haha yeah, I think I know what he had on his mind when he named it... :rolleyes2:
AUSSIE1
Al.
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2006
- Messages
- 8,004
- Reaction score
- 1,979
ok following the theme
Katrina?
